Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Have You Ever Been In Love With The Boy Next Door?

Well I have!!! And it was glorious! (a little Paul McDonald to sing you through this post). 

     It was year 1996, when the Spice Girls, Live, and Much Music’s Big Shiny Tunes were super popular (yah).  Our family had moved into a great little townhouse by the water two years prior and although the landscape was beautiful, the eye candy was definitely not! We were surrounded by old people and as nice as they were, moving a hormonal 16 year-old girl to an old people community did not provide much joy. Like at all. After a couple of years, however, hot guys were coming out of woodwork for some reason!!! It started with the guy up the driveway. He lived in the corner house and he drove a Jeep, and every time I saw this bundle of sexiness I got all giddy. I never actually talked to him of course, since I had the game of a 3 year old at the time, and my sense of style consisted of animal printed Christmas sweatshirts, but he was nice to look at. We did however make out in later life, when I had matured somewhat and gained a bit of style. His presence gave me some sort of hope that great things were to come in this neighbourhood, and that’s when the day came that our new next door neighbours moved in.  This was the day my life would all of sudden lift from its boring state of being and turn into a somewhat fun existence.
     The actual day was pretty cloudy (I believe it was spring) and of course being the curious (or maybe nosey) person I am, I had to creep out the window to see who these new people were.  I mean as much as I loved our previous 80 year old neighbor named Betty (who honestly was amazing!), I was hoping for some damn youngin’s! As soon as I saw him, an imaginary sun came out and shone over his whole body.  I could hear Hallelujah in my ears, and my face went bright red due to my hormones igniting…FINALLY!  I remained glued to the window all day until they were done moving in. These were the days you actually had to PHYSICALLY “creep” people if you wanted to know what was going on. And the best thing was, was that there were TWO WHOLE boys that moved in and BOTH were attractive!  The one I ended up pursuing was 2 years older, and he was delicious! Brown hair, blue eyes, tall, athletic, great smile. It was a huge score! Both boys were out of high school so it got even better! The years that proceeded honestly created the fondest memories for me.  The family turned out to be amazing. We all instantly connected, and the boys had such fun friends. Being 16 going on 17 I didn’t have much tact I have to say. I was certainly more ballsy then I am now. I would park myself outside our house on a bench to “read” every afternoon, coincidentally at the time, let’s call him Horatio, was to come home from work.  We would talk for hours outside, go for walks with my dog when the moon was out and shining on the water, play basketball, and I even asked him to go to my high school prom! He said yes surprisingly and it was perfect, except for the fact that everyone wanted to dance with him! And some people even thought my sister brought him because he was sitting next to her. Tsk. The entire scenario as a whole though, felt like it was out of a movie – Girl falls in love with the boy next door. It was all so innocent and fun, and honestly it was like that throughout our whatever it was. There was just pure respect between both of us. Then came the night we shared our first kiss. Since our houses were connected (his bedroom wall actually being against my bedroom wall) I had daydreamed many times before going to sleep about Horatio throwing pebbles at my window in the middle of the night to get my attention. I would look out the window, see him standing there smiling in the night, go downstairs, and we would share a passionate kiss! The breeze would rustle around us, my leg would lift, and…blah blah blah…BARF!!!!  WELLLL…this type of event sort of did happen one summer before my 19th birthday. It was 3 a.m. and my sister and I were sharing a room at this point in our lives. I had been fast asleep and all of a sudden I heard my sister say “Lianne! (in a loud whisper voice). She’s like “I think Horatio is throwing stuff at our window!” I was super confused and wondered what she was talking about.  I looked out the window and sure enough Horatio WAS throwing things at our window to get my attention. And it wasn’t pebbles. I was like “OMG! What is going on!?” I hadn’t showered the night before…I looked like shit…and it was 3 a.m. I flip flopped on whether or not I should meet him because I didn’t want to look like shit for our first encounter!!!  My sister, who also had a crush on him I found out, wasn’t super excited about this I don’t think. I ended up giving in to the idea of seeing him and proceeded to put on an ugly green sweatshirt with a polar bear on it (as I said…no style), brushed my teeth, and went downstairs in my pajamas. I looked ravishing. I didn’t want to make it super obvious I was trying to clean up for him and I think it was pretty clear. I slowly made my way down the stairs as quietly as I could so I wouldn’t wake my parents, and went outside the back patio door. My heart was pounding and I was super nervous and didn’t know if this was the best decision. I also hoped that there was no dog shit in the backyard to step on.  I had wished at that point that I hadn’t waited until the morning to take my damn shower!!!!!  EFF!!!! There he was standing in a rather tipsy state surrounded by lettuce, lemons, and whatever else he found in his fridge to throw at the window. His friend was in the background with a BBQed sausage asking if I wanted one (not in a gross sexual innuendo way). AT this point I was like what the fuck do I do?? After his friend left I asked him what he was doing and things became fuzzy after that. All I know is that we started to make out in the backyard for a long time. I was standing on my tip toes thinking I’ve waited two years for this! Not quite the way I pictured it but it was happening!!!  HOORRRRAYYY! It was 6 a.m. by the time I went back upstairs which at that time I just jumped in the shower because I had to volunteer that morning in Toronto. I was on cloud nine and I couldn’t believe what had just happened.  I was replaying all of the events of that evening/morning when all of a sudden I heard a knock on the bathroom door and my mother’s voice asking if Horatio had been over. I was like “what?? No!”  thinking “how the fuck did she figure that out so soon??”.  SPY!!!! She was like “Oh…well I found this university matchbook on the floor”, and I was like “Oh…shit ” (in my head). I get out of the shower and my mom is standing there and she was like “what is that on your neck?” I ran to my room, looked in the mirror, and there it was…a huge hickey.  Like a big leech latched onto my skin! I was grounded on the spot which was ridiculous since I was 18 going on 19, but it was all worth it!!!  I had finally made out with HORATIO!!!!! There is more drama that came about due to this passionate courtship that summer but I will have to save that for another day because that’s a whole story in Itself!
     After that summer all my friends went to university, including Horatio (he was going back), and I stayed back for the year. It was a lonely time for me and I kind of went wild going to bars with another friend of mine that also didn’t go to school that year. I went to visit Horatio a couple of times at school (when I was there to see my friends) and a year later I ended up going to the same university. I honestly thought we would get married down the road after we both settled and got our lives together. After that summer and when I went to school we didn’t see each other as often. We both were living our own lives, getting involved with other people, but the universe would still  bring us back together in a series of random events. We’d randomly run into each other at gas stations that I don’t normally use, at ATM machines in a 50,000 plus football stadium, bars, restaurants, and every time this happened it was like no time had passed. The huge connection was still there. There would be so much excitement between the two of us seeing each other and we would end up talking a mile a minute catching up on what was going on in our life.  We never officially labeled what we had had as dating so I kept wondering what a real relationship would be like with him when I would see him and why I kept running into him. It was such a tease!!! There was one summer about 5 years ago where we could have dated. We were both single at that time and we had run into each other at a restaurant on Canada Day. He was with his brother’s wife’s sister and I was with my friends and when we saw each other we gave the biggest hug imaginable and set up a plan to see each other the next night at a local bar. I was super stoked. My sister and I went together, and I made sure I looked super hot. He was with his friends and when we saw each other there were definitely sparks flying. We were flirting and drinking and his friends kept asking if I would consider dating him under the circumstances. I was confused at what circumstances there were and wondered if they thought we had dated and broken up in the past! Of course I said yeah! Obviously! even though I still had no clue what they were talking about. They also seemed to know a lot about what happened between us in the past and that made me curious about what Horatio was divulging and why he was even saying anything at all.  What was going on??!  There were so many thoughts going through my head, and so much confusion. Later on in the night one of his friends finally blurted out that he had been talking about me the entire day! I was floored when he said that and I started to feel super hopeful and excited.  I thought “He has feelings for me still…AH!” We ended up sitting on a bar couch that night and he would tell me that I looked good and we held hands. We were going to set up a date the next day to watch a movie but he was a little tipsy the night we made that plan so I didn’t think he was serious or would remember. In the past, there was a bit of unreliability regarding plans, so I didn’t know to take it seriously. We never did the movie and he actually did remember and thought we would be getting together that day. From there things changed a bit. We would still randomly meet each other after this one summer, and his friends would still mention the same thing about dating him and circumstances, but nothing came of it. We were both in Toronto at one point, and he called me one night out of the blue to let me know he was moving an hour away. I was hoping since we lived in the same city that we would be able to hang out more, but when he moved he disappeared and I couldn’t get a hold of him. I heard he had started a relationship from his mother a little while later and this relationship ended up turning rather serious.  I would get details from his Mom that made me really worried that things would turn out really well with those two. I really wanted to meet with him again so I could tell him how I felt about him before a potential engagement ensued but never got that chance. Sure enough his mother told me he had gotten engaged that year.  It was certainly heartbreaking to hear of his engagement and I’m not going to lie, I cried…A LOT! My heart ached for a long time.  I couldn’t at that point tell him my feelings and I guess things are meant to be but it sucked! I still often wonder what would have happened if we pursued something serious that one summer. Or what would have happened if I got to tell him how I felt over the years. It’s taken a bit of time to get over the “what if’s” in this situation but I have finally moved on and am ready to meet someone just as great. The one good thing that came out of this was the fact that I know I could feel that true love with someone. He will always be my first true love and the one that seemingly got away.

Have a lovely afternoon!! xo


  1. This was such an awesome post to read Lianne!

    I often wonder about some of the guys I had crushes on when I was younger, but no matter what, I always end up looking at what I have now (Huib) and being thankful that nothing ever happened with them :) He's just so amazing and I couldn't imagine being with anyone else :)

    I hope that someday you will find your "Huib" and look back on the past and be thankful nothing happened :)

    Come visit my blog someday

  2. Your first love will stay with you forever. Romantic, secret, passionate kisses that you steal in the night with the boy next door are the best. They make the biggest impressions on your heart. You will remember them forever. There is nothing like them. Even when you move on and find the love of your life-the partner you share a home, a marraige and a family with there will always be those stolen kisses in the night marked on your heart with your first love--and there is nothing wrong with that. Cherish those memories and remember Horatio fondly...I know I remember my "George" often and cherish his mark on my heart. Love you xoxoxoxoxoxo